I was moved
recently upon reading about Randy Pausch. He was asked to give a "last
lecture" at Carnegie Mellon University. Many universities have
professors give a "last lecture" in which they ruminate on what matters
to them most. Shortly after agreeing to give the lecture, Randy learned
that he was dying. He decided to give the lecture anyway and it became
a truly "last lecture." It got me to thinking. What would I leave
behind in my last lecture? What pearls of wisdom could I pass on? Here
is what I would like to say.
Einstein and Hawking
notwithstanding, time is fleeting. I'd like to tell my children that
time passes by faster than you could possibly imagine. It sounds
cliche, but one day you wake up and realize-- oh, before I forget. I
brought my good suit in to be dry cleaned. It's not the dry cleaners we
usually use. It's the one by the Vons. Not the Vons by the Frame
Store... the one by the donut shop. I paid in advance, so don't let
them charge you again. And in the back of my sock drawer is my good
underwear. My underwear drawer is for my everyday underwear. You'll
understand the concept of "good underwear" as you get older. There's a
bag of batteries in the hall closet. Those are all no good. I was going
to take them in to be recycled, but never got around to it. I'm pretty
sure there's a recycling place right by Trader Joe's. Not the Trader
Joe's by the movie theater... the Trader Joe's by the donut shop. Hey,
if you take the batteries to be recycled, you can pick up my good suit
at the dry cleaners. Remember not to let the pool get too low. It
should always be just above the first line of grout on the tiles or the
filter won't work right. This isn't so much of a problem in the winter,
but in summer keep an eye out for it. Especially on the hot days. I
left a key to the front door under a fake rock near the garage.
Actually, now that I think about it, I'm pretty sure that it's an old
key. Remember when I put the ladder through the window of the front
door and we had to have it replaced? Well we put in a new lock and I
never replaced the key. Take care of that, will you? I have an
account at County Bank that I never got around to closing. There's
only about seventy-five bucks in it, but it's something. Remember the
garage door sticks after it rains. Don't forget to feed the fish.
There's a roll of film I haven't developed yet in the junk drawer.
It's from our trip to Coronado. You can have my wallet, I know you
always liked it. Don't forget Mom's birthday is on October first... or
the third. Pay your credit card bills at least two days before they're
due. Oh, and one last thing. When you go through my computer files...
if you come across a lot of porn... it's research I was doing for a
screenplay I was working on about pornography.
Steve Rudnick
4/10/08
|
|
